Last May, I had a post about Mental Health Month on my old blog. I was in a different place, mentally and emotionally. I had jumped dumped a guy for cheating on me, I quit therapy and medication wasn’t really helping.
Now I am in a great relationship (though it’s still early), I’m making plans for our future, Spring Semester is winding down (finally) and I gained a few new diagnoses. I do feel like a quote from last year’s post is still true, “It’s not depression so much anymore, just anxiety.” I’m anxious and restless and just overall all feel weird. I think this is due in part to a combination of the meds I am on and the new diagnosis.
I’m back in therapy for the third time. I really like this one, so I hope I can make some progress. She gave me an assignment, since I wasn’t able to make another appointment for a month. I am supposed to “feel my feelings” when I get anxious or restless. I’ll be honest – I am not doing this every single time. I would be doing nothing else than feeling my feelings. But I am trying to catch myself in the big moments and figure out why I’m feeling that way and to calm myself down. It’s a process.
I am also enrolled in Diabetes Education classes. Due to a combo of genetics, bad diet, anxiety and Binge Eating Disorder, I am “borderline pre-diabetic”. Obviously, I don’t want to become diabetic, so I will work hard in those 16 weeks of classes to learn and change and grow.
This month, I turn 33. I’m not nervous or scared or anything. Honestly, it’s just another day. It will be a little different this year, as I have a Significant Other who actually cares about me and my kids, so maybe it will even be fun.
The plan is to drive up to my parents’ house in the morning, have a BBQ bonfire with s’mores, take some photos, maybe do some sparklers, and head home to a clean, quiet house to relax after being with people all day. I’m an introverted introvert – people exhaust me – even if they’re family.
I’m hoping to blog more about mental health and our life here in Northern Minnesota. Stay Tuned!